While talking to my best friend a couple of days ago, I made the statement, "I feel like this summer has been a waste". I said that because at the time I felt like I haven't done anything spectacular this summer. I have been a few places and done a few things but I just felt like I have coasted through this summer not really trying to soak all the opportunities from it. Lately, I have been thinking about my mistakes. Recently my mom said to me, "Emily, you are so worried about screwing up that you have become to hard on yourself. It's okay to mess up." I have never been able to accept that. Hearing it the other night, I felt like it finally settled with me. It's okay to mess up. In the words of my favorite Pearl Jam song, "I'm still alive." This summer I have fully experienced that "life is what happens when you are making plans." I have been clinging to the hope given in Jeremiah 29:11 where God tells us he knows the plans he has for us and that they are plans to prosper us, not to harm us. I am so glad I am not in control. I have realized this summer just how worthless I am. I am the worst of sinners. I am unrighteous. I deserve to pay the sinner's price. God has taught me the same lesson this summer as my mother. It is okay to make mistakes."My grace is sufficient for thee, my power is made perfect in weakness. ( 2 Corinthians 12:9)" I can not ignore possibly the most exciting part of my summer. When Alex got down on one knee on a beach in Destin, Florida on July 9, 2011 I could not have placed a more happier moment in my life. I think of Ephesians 5:22 that says "Wives submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord." This verse had always been a going joke in my youth group for the boys to pick at us girls. Thinking of my life to come with Alex, I could not be more pleased to submit to him as his wife. In our five years together, we have been through some times. He is my best friend in the entire world and I can't imagine my life without him in it. I will serve him and God faithfully for the rest of my life with a smile on my face. I take back what I said about this summer being a waste.
"A man's car is never finished and a women's closet is never full."
This thought across my mind as I stood getting ready in my bathroom mirror. Now, whether I created this quote of I subconsciously pulled it from somewhere else I had seen it I will never know. For now, I will claim it as my own. This explains to both parties, male and female, a very important principal. As women, we don't understand why they are constantly putting money into their cars. As men, they do not understand why we need more clothes. This sums it up beautifully and poetically.
Today thumbing through my bible I found the passage Isaiah 56:10-11. It reads "As the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." This is my new dedication. I have learned two very important lessons in college. The first lesson was that communing with other christians for support and guidance is essential to a happy faithful life. I have also learned that growing up my eyes were somewhat shut. This morning the lesson was on opening your eyes to see God's purpose. We are not supposed to stay in our buildings and dwell on keeping our man-made traditions. The gospel message did not stop with Christ dying. We are commanded to "go out into the world and make disciples of all nations baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit (Matthew 28:19)." I fell in love with this verse for it's obvious meteorological application to the great commission.
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